I was just walking home in the rain, and thinking about life. One of the things I was thinking about was Friday’s. You know how people always say “Thank God It’s Friday” or something like that?
I dislike that. I am very rarely thankful that it’s Friday, because Friday leads to Saturday and Sunday. On my undergrad campus, no one takes Friday seriously. Friday is a joke. The weekend has already begun on Friday.
Weekends make me sad.
I live for the week. For being in the classroom, in meetings, and doing things with people. As much as I hate having things on my schedule, I love being busy. Weekends are the time when I am not busy. For a couple years, my involvement kept me busy on the weekend. Programs and events, attendance at school plays, games, and other stuff kept me going. Last year that dropped off a bit, as I was busy in other ways.
Now the weekend is just a metaphor for the rest of my life. A time when I have no plans, and barely any work to get done. I’ve been challenging myself to get up, to get out, to do more. But it’s really hard when everyone I know is involved with different stuff, or not at all interested in the things I am interested in.
I’ve spent a lot of time in the last few weeks watching DVD’s, reading books, and aimlessly browsing the internet. It’s weird. I know it’s good that I have all this free time, and that I should be using it to relax, and that that is okay. I’ve just lived with an incredibly fine structure for the last couple of years, and I no longer have that.
I really need to rebuild that.
Well. That went in a direction that I did not expect.